How to Advocate for Yourself when You Feel Unheard: The Truth about Medical Gaslighting
You trust your healthcare provider to help with your medical concerns. You rely on their experience and expertise to manage your symptoms. And you expect them to offer answers to your questions. But what happens when your questions go unanswered? Or worse, your provider dismisses your symptoms or tells you that you are fine — but you know something is wrong.
Recognizing when a health professional minimizes your health issues is the first step to taking charge of your health. Here is a guide to help spot medical gaslighting and simple actions you can take when you're feeling unheard.
What is Medical Gaslighting?
When your doctor ignores your health needs, it can leave you feeling confused and powerless. But what is this phenomenon exactly? It's called medical gaslighting. It happens when health care practitioners manipulate you into thinking you are exaggerating or imagining your symptoms. Gaslighting is not a new phenomenon, and unfortunately, it does take place in healthcare.
So, who is affected by Gaslighting?
Too often, women, people of color, and other marginalized groups experience gaslighting when seeking medical care. For example, a 2008 study found that women seen in the emergency room were less likely than male patients to receive pain killers. This is true even when both groups experience the same amount of pain.
Findings from a 2012 study found similar results. Hispanic patients were 22 percent less likely than white patients to receive pain relievers for similar painful conditions. African American patients were 29 percent less likely than white to receive pain relievers, as reported in Pain Medicine.
Does Gaslighting Cause and Harm?
A delay in your treatment can have serious or even fatal consequences. Undiagnosed conditions may worsen symptoms and cause emergency room visits and unnecessary hospital stays. A 2000 study published in The New England Journal of Medicine found that women were seven times more likely than men to be misdiagnosed and discharged in the middle of having a heart attack.
Scary, right?
What's also concerning is that women are more likely to be misdiagnosed than men because researchers know a lot less about the female body. In fact, it wasn't until 1986 that the National Institutes of Health established policies to encourage scientists to include women in research studies.
Because women have historically been left out of clinical trials and medical research, a knowledge gap exists. So, this affects how providers diagnose or treat conditions, specifically in women. Thankfully, laws have been enacted that mandate that underrepresented groups like women and minorities be included in medical research.
What are the Signs of Gaslighting?
It's important to recognize when a healthcare provider may not be taking your concerns seriously. Gaslighting comes in many forms and may look like:
· Your provider does not want to research your symptoms further — or relate your symptoms to stress, anxiety, or depression.
· Feeling ignored or not taken seriously by members of your healthcare team.
· Your provider assures you that you are okay even when your instincts tell you something is wrong.
· Feeling talked down to or minimized.
· Your provider denies your request to have more tests done and does not explain why you don't need them.
How to Advocate for Self
It may be challenging to navigate interactions with a healthcare provider who may be gaslighting you. But here are a few tips to help you respond to the behavior and get the care you deserve:
· Find a provider you trust: Choose a healthcare professional you are comfortable with to help you make medical decisions. This person should be a champion for your health and have values and characteristics that align with your health needs. Make a list of the qualities that are important to you since, ideally, you will be establishing a long-term relationship with them. Ask for referrals. Don't be afraid to ask around to see which provider your friends or family are visiting. Then, consider setting up an appointment to meet the provider face to face to get a feel for the environment and the people who work there.
· Speak up: Open and honest communication with your healthcare team is critical. So, if you are feeling like you're being dismissed, don't be afraid to bring up your concerns with your doctor or nurse. Articulate your worries and ask questions.
· Bring a friend: Sometimes, having someone else in the room like a friend or partner is helpful when dealing with gaslighting. Especially if they can help back up the symptoms you've been experiencing or advocate for you when you're feeling emotionally or physically overwhelmed. Your ally might also ask questions or have the tough conversations you may be afraid to have.
· Document your visit. Bring a notebook and pen with you to record your experience in real-time. This may help you feel more confident about what you know is true.
· Change Doctors: Remember that you always have options. If you don't feel like your health care team is listening to your concerns even after multiple attempts to communicate your issue, consider seeking alternative care.
You're a Health Expert
When your health concerns are ignored, it impacts your mental and physical health. Remember that you are the top expert on your body by virtue of living in it, and you have the right to be treated with dignity and respect. Ultimately, when you know the signs of medical gaslighting, you can identify the behavior and stop it in its tracks.
Janelle King is a Registered Nurse with a Master of Public Health. She has written articles for Sisters from AARP, The Body: The HIV/AIDS Resource, Modern Fertility, among many others, and featured in Women's Day Magazine. You can find her writing about reproductive health and wellness in her blog The Nurse Note in her spare time. Follow her on Facebook and Instagram @thenursenote.